hello world

it's a dizzying start of the year. i'm all out of rhythm. my sleep schedule isn't adapting to my 5 new classes or my late-night radio sessions. i'm hoping that once i get a job off-campus, it'll help build a consistent circadian rhythm somewhere in between the two currently existing points, but the whole struggle of job hunting all over again is exhausting. i took in one of my friends when he got kicked out, and not only am i stressed as hell about having an "illegal" roommate, but it's just plain weird adapting to household norms with another new person. i feel like i only really get about half an hour of free time every day, and i know things are only going to get more intense as the semester goes on.

yeah, fuck it, let's start a new passion project!

i've always been just outside the programming circle. i made shitty animations on scratch for fun when i was little, i have a bunch of mod installers on my xbox, i've been on tumblr for a decade as well as every myspace clone to hit the web. somehow, someway, i have never actually learned how to code. so this has been a massive learning process. i first set up this page in, i believe, 2023. it was a barely altered template, and i had set it up to be basically equivalent to a carrd. it was so twitterbrained... but i'm trying to take a step back. i logged out of my main twitter account to move to bluesky, i only use tiktok long enough each day to send a video to each of my friends with whom i keep up a streak, and the only other app i consistently use, instagram, is only on my phone so i can post semesterly photo dumps and promote local events. i like having a space where i can talk about anything, though, especially when that space is somewhere that people choose to access - i hate posting online more than every once in a blue moon because i'm terrified of people thinking i'm annoying. people who go out of their way to seek out what i have to say, though, i am all good with dumping every last thought in my head to. and what could be more "my special little corner that no one can be exposed to on accident" than a blog? i don't see myself posting here daily. as insane as my life is, not enough of the business is really interesting enough to ramble about every single day. i'll probably just update every time i have some kind of interesting new thing to add - big changes in my life, going to shows, i'd like to keep up a dream journal but my dreams aren't as vivid as often as they used to. so i don't know. whatever happens with this webpage, i'm excited to see it grow and change. i'm excited to know you'll be on this journey with me.